Ranting, nagging, and generally being unhappy!

Be warned, this post is not book related! You are not interested in me feeling crappy, don’t read it!

I’m bored, I’m unhappy, I am lonely! I seriously am fed up with myself!
I have a proposal for a research grant to write and am not in the mood to start it! This whole week I just kept looking at the requirement and format booklet and didn’t even read it!
I spent a whole wad of money on yarn and beads and crotchet needles supposedly to start some craft projects and have not done anything with them.
Dear hubby has been out traveling for a week and will be gone for another two and half week! I am lonely, darn it! I hate the house all empty and quite!
I have been shopping like some possessed woman and probably will do more damage to my bank account this coming week too! And you know what my Fortune Cookie was this afternoon? “Be careful not to overspend” How is that for irony?!
One side of my bed has been covered in winter clothing for a week now and I haven’t been in the mood to put them away! There are handbags and purses on the floor of my bedroom and I can’t enter my walk in closet because the cloths are covering the floor! I have become a total slob! I hate myself for it but am doing nothing to make it better!
Even my cats are fed up with me and won’t let me pet them!
I just keep lecturing myself and beating myself over all the things I have to do and make myself miserable! I guess I like feeling miserable!
Gush! What is so wrong with me?!